I'M PRETENDING

I'M PRETENDING

I am broken

I cannot be fixed

I have hurt before

But not like this

So I'm pretending

Yeah I'm pretending

that you're here with me

I can't take the pain, the reality

That for now it just can't be

So I'm pretending

I can open the skies to Heaven

Run up to the pearly gates

Beg to meet my Maker

And ask Him why he couldn't wait

Life's too hard without you

And this void I cannot fill

Believe me I have tried to

But I know I never will

So I'm pretending

Yeah I'm pretending

That you're on the road

Having too much fun 

to bother calling home

Still Pretending....

I keep waiting for it to get better

But there's no way to deal with this

Unthinkable's my only answer

When you were such an amazing kid

No, I can't face the truth...

Life is too hard without you

So lonely without you 

So I'm pretending

I can open the skies to Heaven

Run up to the pearly gates

Beg to meet my Maker

And ask Him why he couldn't wait

Life's too hard without you

And this void I cannot fill

Believe me I have tried to

But I know I never will

So I'm pretending...

I'm pretending

you're not really gone

It's the only way

I keep living on

By Pretending   

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Wrdspnr@aol.com

C2021

IN A REALM WITH YOU

I entered a new realm

when you kissed my lips

I've lived my whole life

and never felt like this

I was grounded

~~~*Chorus*~~~

I look back at thee old me

And I have to shed a tear

Think of all that I was missing

When I wasn't loving here

Here in a realm with you

ooh ooh ooh....

In a realm with you

~~*~~

Yeah, here I'm sensing things

That I can't mention

I want to be with you

in this dimension

Yes, I'm floating

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

In a realm without the want of a single possession

Nothing matters anymore, but this fire-hot obsession

That old me, left behind, she and I are through

I'll never, in this life, get enough of loving you

ooh ooh ooh...

Here in a realm with you..

~~*~~

~~~*Chorus*~~~

I look back at thee old me

And I have to shed a tear

Think of all that I was missing

When I wasn't loving here

Here in a realm with you

ooh ooh ooh....

In a realm with you

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright© 2019

Wrdspnr@aol.com

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY

On the 4th of July we declared our freedom

We'd formed our United States

George the 3rd ruled the Monarchy

And the French helped hold our gates

General Washington led our soldiers

To keep enemies from its shores

With our allies by our side

Britain reigned no more

~~~*Chorus*~~~

Freedom's what wars are challenged for

There will be certain death

Shouted out by every Man's 

What Patrick Henry said

And there would be more

To reign means war

But hey!

Happy Independence Day!

~~*~~

The battle for the seas was the second war

With no reason to be fighting anymore

Too late we'd opened up that door

Britain came from Canada and to our shores

So many died for Freedom's cry

But when the blood was washed away

Our second war for Independence

Sustains us to this day

Hey!

Happy Independence day!

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

Yes, I celebrate our freedom from the monarchy

I live in the United States

I know her flaws, her fallacies

And I also know what makes her great

I thank the troops that keep her free

The men who've lived and died for her

The brilliant minds, spread over time

Those who are and those who were

Hey! 

Happy Independence Day!

~~*~~

~~~*Chorus*~~~

Freedom's what wars are challenged for

There will be certain death

Shouted out by every man's 

What Patrick Henry said

And there would be more

To reign means war

But hey!

Happy Independence Day!

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright ©2019

Wrdspnr@aol.com 

WORTH THE RISK

It was the 10th of May 

Senior year last day

Went home to kick back and relax

Stopped to grab the mail 

was a post from jail

Had to be my cousin Jack

He said he was afraid

He would call today

Sure hoped that I'd be home

And the more I read

The more he could be dead

He should have left that girl alone

~~~*Chorus*~~~

He wrote it's not fair

With her honeyed hair

And her pretty pink kiss-me-lips

Let me tell you now

You would see just how

Oh, Cousin she was worth the risk

~~*~~

Well he called at eight

Summoned up his fate

His chances were mighty slim

The girl who stole his heart

The Angel's work of art

Her Daddy was the sheriff's kin

It was ten o'clock

When I heard the knock

And when I opened my front door

The farmer's daughter's face

Put me in my place

Here's what he went to jail for

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

Jack found Aphrodite in a teen aged form

Sittin on a tractor in a field of corn

Seventeen and suntanned from her head to toe

If you're gonna hang she was the way to go

~~*~~

And she was right there

With her honeyed hair

And her pretty pink kiss-me-lips

Let me tell you now

I can see just how

He figured she was worth the risk

~~~*Finale*~~~

Well Jack didn't die

Yeah the judge was kind

So if you're gonna hit don't miss

A new chance at life

With his pretty bride

Oh, buddy she was worth the risk

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson
Kane Allen Holmes

Copyright© 2019

Wrdspnr@aol.com

WHAT SEPARATES US

I walked into your house today

Looked at the pictures you'd displayed

And tried hard not to cry

Wish I could see you sitting there

Hot cup of tea messed up red hair

I want to look into your eyes

See what I didn't know

How far you'd planned to go

I would not have left your side

Girl, I miss that smile...

~~~*Chorus*~~~

All that used to separate us

was the distance of miles

Talking on the telephone

I pictured your smile

And your laughter 

Brought out mine

All that used to separate us

was time...

~~*~~

I think about you every day

Still cry because you went away

And didn't say goodbye

Wish I could see you once again

Before the world comes to an end

So you could tell me why

I want to look into your eyes

See what I didn't know

How far you'd planned to go

I would not have left your side

Girl, I miss that smile...

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

You have to know you broke the hearts

Of everyone you left

Because now what separates us is your

death...

We Love you and we miss you , Your memory

 fills our heads

Because now what separates us is your death...

~~*~~

~~~*Chorus*~~~

All that used to separate us

was the distance of miles

Talking on the telephone

I pictured your smile

And your laughter 

Brought out mine

All that used to separate us

was time..

~~*~~

~~~*Finale*~~~

Sometimes the pain's so bad

I can't catch my breath

Because what separates us

Is your death...

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Wrdspnr@aol.com

Copyright © 2019

#suicide #Memories
#Helpless

THE COST OF LOVING

The snow is falling

And the lights blur with my tears

I'm remembering

Her Love throughout the years

As the lights dance

With those flakes so brilliant white

I see the beauty

But not the reason why

~~~*1st Chorus*~~~

The reason why He chose someone

Who'll leave so many lost

When you know He knows the damage

Yeah, the cost

Tell me why's 

The cost so high

~~*~~

I see her in the bleachers 

With the crowd

I hear her on the sidelines 

Screaming loud

Her pretty face at every game

Shouting out that lucky name

Tell me why's

The cost so high

It does not make sense to me

Now she has to fight to breathe

Someone so young 

Should not hurt like she does

Someone we Love

God tell me why

Is the cost so high

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

Good people live, and love, and try

To make the most out of their lives

And then you strike them down 

Before their time

Why

Why's the cost so high

~~*~~

I just need to know the reason why....

~~~*2nd Chorus*~~~

The reason why You chose someone

Who'll leave so many lost

When I know You know the damage

Yeah, the cost

Tell me why's 

The cost so high

~~*~~

~~~*Finale*~~

I see the beauty of loving deep inside....

But I wonder why.....

Why's the cost so high

~~*~~

TeresaLynnJohnson

Copyright © 2019

Wrdspnr@aol.com

Aunt Patty <3

THAT BEAUTIFUL, MAGICAL, SMILE

You say that you're broken

I believe you

But girl I really need you 

To stay strong

To keep holding on

To whatever magic moved you

For so long

No way to prove to you

The miracles 

That shine on through

That smile

Every time I've doubted life

Hurt so bad I want to cry

I think of all the power

You have shown

Strength I've never known

Don't know what I expect

From  you

Cause the Hell that you've

Been living through

Most people would have 

Gave up as a child

While the rest of us screamed,

"No Fair!"

You pulled magic from thin air

And all the while...

Shared that smile

Yeah I know that you 

Are broken

Known for a long time

But reality is killing me

I'd rather see the smile..

It's the proof 

You have magic

We can see

And it's beautiful

So beautiful to me

And, Yes, I've cursed the fates

Even God with all his grace

As I know you've had to do 

a million times

But you've always smiled

That beautiful 

Magical

Smile

TeresaLynn Johnson

Wrdspnr@aol.com
Copyright © 2019 

For you ...Autumn Marie

I am , as always, in awe! 

Love, Teresa 
#Strength #FriedreichsAtaxia
#Faith

DRIVE RIGHT ON THROUGH

Yeah I've been there

I've been down that road

To the town of negativity

Where nothing good can grow

And we all wish that we'd never

We all want to turn back time

We all dream of a better

Set of stepping stones in life

~~~*Chorus*~~~

No one wants to flirt with failure

No one wants to dance with pain

Celebrate their disappointments 

Or brag about their shame

The highway it is changing

And your route depends on you

Do not take that exit

And if you do...

Drive right on through

~~*~~

The dark foreboding exit

To a deep depressive town

No positive reactions

It was built to drag you down

You can bypass it with laughter

Fight through your despair 

Drive right on through

You don't want to go there

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~
Pain is strong... but so are you
Do not choke... drive right on through
No time to waste... Inhale that faith

And if you find yourselves lost

Sometimes we do....

Drive right on through

~~*~~

~~~*Chorus*~~~

No one wants to flirt with failure

No one wants to dance with pain

Celebrate their disappointments 

Or brag about their shame

The highway it is changing

And your route depends on you

Do not take that exit

And if you do...

Drive right on through

~~*~~

~~*Finale*~~

The destination's easy

I won't mask the truth

But life's too short to live there

Drive right on through...

~~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright ©2018 

Wrdspnr@aol.com
#Depression #Addiction
#Strength #Coping

HOLDING MIRRORS

Time to own up

Grow up so you can

Finally thank them

Every helping hand

Who stood beside you

When they thought they should

Time to grow up

Time to make things good

~~~*Chorus*~~~

Don't bite the hand extended 

Don't destroy their trust

Next time they won't be there 

Picking pieces up

Stop playing the victim

Blaming someone else

I'll hold a mirror for you

Can you see yourself?

~~*~~

The reflection

May help you to see

The world owes you

Not a single thing

Family came through

When they heard your cries

They were present

They were on your side

~~~*Bridge*~~~

When the tide waters rise to engulf you

As they rage and churn 

Remember you're not their victim

You chose to watch those bridges burn

~~*~~

~~~*2nd Chorus*~~

You bit the hand extended 

And destroyed their trust

Didn't even thank them

Though they backed you up

Keep playing the victim

Blaming someone else

I held the mirror for you

You can't see yourself

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright ©2018 

Wrdspnr@aol.com

SHE'S GONE AWAY

She is gone

Nowhere to be found

Believe me I have searched

And just as true hearts pound

My mistake

has caused mine to break

Believe me when I say

She's gone

She's gone away

~~~*Chorus*~~~

That little girl is gone

There's no time to grieve

Another is in need

Needs you desperately

Just as she is gone

Standing in her place

The fracture she became

Formed by what they've raised

Have to take a break

She's gone

She's gone away

~~*~~

He is here

And he has a chance

To have what they've denied

If you can turn your back

On the past

Not another glance

This time you have a say

He's here

She's gone away

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

Maybe we can find her 

Once this child has been saved

Fight to kill her demons 

In her mind where they now play

Right now you've got to focus

On the here and now today...

There's a baby who needs you

Because she has gone away

~~*~~

~~~*Chorus*~~~

That little girl is gone

There's no time to grieve

Another is in need

Needs you desperately

Just as she is gone

Standing in her place

The fracture she became

Formed by what they've raised

Have to take a break

She's gone

She's gone away

~~*~~

~~*Finale*~~

Hang on to your memories

Her sweetness and her smile

But right now open up your eyes...

She is a different person

And with her he's not safe

She's broken far too many times

~~~*~~~

Nothing more to say...

She's gone away

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright © 2017

Wrdspnr@aol.com

SUPERNATURAL

Brothers bound
Cursed or luck
Tortured minds 
Demon touched 
Chasing evil is the job
The right to life always the cause

Love so deep they'd trade their souls
Fix what's broken
Make it whole
Don't believe in everything you see
Or you're fractured for eternity

~~~*Chorus*~~~
A path to Hell 
The Horseman's rings
Demons wrapped in Angel wings
Blood suckers out to bleed you dry
Purgatory is the constant fight
Far too much collateral
Dealing with the supernatural
~~*~~

Fairy tales that come to life
Not the happily-ever-after kind
Fables you didn't think were true
Gonna make a dinner out of you

Citizens oblivious
Their stress is but a witches hex
How did the world end up this way
God's new digs can't be explained

~~~* Lyrical Bridge*~~~
You don't know what's out there
You're not sure what to believe
Those who do sure want a hero
With an Angel on their sleeve 
Is it fiction in the darkness
Or is the terror actual
You want someone in your corner
If it's supernatural
~~*~~ 

~~~*Chorus*~~~
A path to Hell 
The Horseman's rings
Demons wrapped in Angel wings
Blood suckers out to bleed you dry
Purgatory is the constant fight
Far too much collateral
When the job is supernatural
~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson
Wrdspnr@aol.com
Copyright © 2017

EXTENDED HANDS

I can't say 
I know the way 
You're feeling
Inside

Want to take 
Your inner pain 
That's stealing
Your smile

You're so brave 
Because you say
Don't worry
I'm fine

It's not true 
But I love you
I'll give you
Your time....       

~~~*Chorus*~~~
Time to feel, and time to heal, when you don't think you can
Time to start, mending the heart, fighting to understand
But if your road keeps on crumbling
And you're sinking in the sand
I pray you'll know, all along that road, there are extended hands
Palms up, fingers stretched, reaching to pull you close
Don't be afraid to grab one
When you need it the most
It's the love, He placed on earth
Family and Friends...
Our hands extend
~~*~~

I can't say 
Pain fades away
It's different
Each time

How you feel 
And what you do
I'm knowing
You'll cry

You're so brave
Because you say
Don't worry
I'm fine

It's not true
But I Love you
I'll give you
Your time.... 

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~  
When it's hard for you
What to say and do
So difficult for us
The ice so thin
It barely holds
Something we dare not touch
Waiting on the banks
Family and Friends
Praying your hope hasn't ended
As I've said, please don't forget
With our loving hands extended

~~~*Chorus*~~~
Time to feel, and time to heal, when you don't think you can
Time to start, mending the heart, fighting to understand
But if your road keeps on crumbling
And you're sinking in the sand
I pray you'll know, all along that road, there are extended hands
Palms up, fingers stretched, reaching to pull you close
Don't be afraid to grab one
When you need it the most
It's the love, He placed on earth
Family and Friends...
Our hands extend
~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson
Wrdspnr@aol.com
Copyright © 2017
#Loss #Grief #Love
#Family #Friends 
#Support

STORM CRAZY DAY

I picked a storm crazy day to come and see you

The fog won't thin, and the rain won't cease to fall

Yes, it's a turbulent day to come and see you

But Sister I am sure that you recall

~~~*Chorus*~~~

I'm not afraid of the highway

Even when it's difficult to see

I just keep my eye

Peeled on that yellow line

And pray for visibility

That's what I do

God sees me through

~~*~~

I picked a violent day to come and see you

But as my car is eating up the miles

In my mind's a special place

Where I always see your face

And Sister I can't help but smile

I don't hesitate

To head your way

Even on a storm crazy day

I mean it when I say

You take away

All the gray in a storm crazy day

&

~~~*Chorus*~~~

I'm not afraid of the highway

Even when it's difficult to see

I just keep my eye, peeled on that yellow line

And pray for visibility

That's what I do

God sees me through

~~*~~

~~~*Finale*~~~

Pulled into your drive

And I saw your smile

The tension it just fell away

I mean it when I say

You take away

All the gray in a storm crazy day...

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright© 2016

Wrdspnr@aol.com

I Love You Sis XO 

SWEET LITTLE LULLABY ( Children's lyrics )

Sweet little Angel close your eyes

Listen to your lullaby

Of..

Building blocks and Tonka trucks

Teddy bears and rubber ducks

Kitty Cats of black and white

And puppy dogs with big brown eyes

Kites that float up in the clouds

Cotton candy and circus clowns

ABC's and 123's

Little red wagons and bumble bees

Paper planes that you will make

Laughing friends and birthday cakes

Sweet little _____ close your eyes

And listen to your lullaby

Of...

Froggies jumping in the pond

Hugs and kisses from Dad and Mom

Baby chickens on a farm

Little gray ponies and big red barns

Trees to climb and tire swings

Sunny days and birds that sing

A hill of dirt with "Hot wheels" cars

Boats on a lake and monkey bars

Choo choo trains going down the track

Cartoons, Kool-Aid, and jumping jacks

Trips to the zoo and fire trucks

A day at the park and lady bugs

Flowers covered with butterflies

Shining stars up in the sky

Angel kisses and a gentle touch

_____ Loves you, oh so much

My little _____  with closed eyes

Did you like your lullaby?

When tomorrow's at its end

I'll sing it to you once again

For now, just sleep with all my love

And that should comfort you...

Enough....

Mmmmm

Teresa Lynn Johnson
Wrdspnr@aol.com
Copyright © 2016

WHERE DO WE GO? ( Children's lyrics )

There was a little lady bug flying through the sky

She saw a butterfly, and she said, "Hi, Hi!

Do you know where we go?"

And the butterfly said, "I don't know. I don't know!"

There was a baby ducky, floating on the pond

His best friend was a big green frog

He said to the frog, "Do you know where we go?"

And the froggy said, "I don't know. I don't know!"

There was a fluffy puppy, running on the farm

He ran in to the big red barn

He said to the horse, "Do you know where we go?"

And the Horsey said, "I don't know. I don't know!"

There was a little lamb, she was white as snow

She asked the pink piggy, "Do you know where we go?"

And the piggy said, "I don't know. I don't know!"

Well they all went together, the animals and bugs

they walked and flew through the rain and mud

the sun came out, and they all cheered

"We are here! We are here!"

It was a big party for one and all

From the cow so big, to the bug so small

They all laughed, cause now they know

This is where they had to go!

This is where they had to go!

  

Teresa Lynn Johnson
Wrdspnr@aol.com
Copyright © 2016

LINCOLN COUNTY LINE

     Lincoln County Line     
The desert in Nevada
Heat burns him alive
The night's still as stone...
oh... so dead and cold
Like the heart of the woman
Loved, but left behind

Here to heal himself
Tear her from his mind
Here to purge his heart
Lincoln County Line

Renew this damaged soul...
Feed the pulse don't let it go..
From her hold he climbs 
Lincoln County Line

Too young to give up life
So he trades with time
Grieves, and comes back strong
From Lincoln County Line
     
Lincoln County Line     
The desert in Nevada
Heat burns him alive
The night's still as stone...
oh... so dead and cold
Like the heart of the woman
Loved, but left behind

Had to heal himself
Tear her from his mind
Had to purge his heart
At Lincoln County Line
~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright ©2016

Wrdspnr@aol.com

JACKS ON THE SIDEWALK

Couldn't hear what they were saying 
I just know they talked 
I was playing jacks 
On the sidewalk

~~~*Chorus*~~~
A car flew around the corner 
I heard shots and screams
One raised his hands to Heaven
The other hit his knees
Like a slow motion movie 
Down the block
I was playing jacks
On the sidewalk
~~*~~

Couldn't see if they were bleeding
Waiting for the cops
I was playing jacks 
On the sidewalk

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~
Indifferent to the Mayhem
Oblivion's my friend
Laughter's sweet, here on the streets
Always a sudden end
Maybe it is just a life of shock
I don't live in fear, but faith
While I pass the time, I play
Yeah, I'm just playing jacks 
On the sidewalk

~~~*Chorus*~~~
A car flew around the corner 
I heard shots and screams
One raised his hands to Heaven
The other hit his knees
Like a slow motion movie 
Down the block
I was playing jacks
On the sidewalk
~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright© 2016

Wrdspnr@aol.com

LOVE'S NOT DEFINED THIS WAY

She's like a tiny kitten

In a little child's hands

You must watch her carefully

By now, you should understand

If you really love this girl

As you've always claimed to do

Then why don't you protect her

Not find trials to drag her through

~~~*Chorus*~~~

She's a singing stream...

Runs pure and sweet...

She believes in ruby slippers

And she loves fairy tales

Rainbows aren't just colors

But a promise that won't fail..

She should not feel broken

Seem haunted and afraid..

How can you claim to love her

Love's not defined this way

~~*~~

She follows, but she's fragile

And there's danger where you lead

If you can't keep her safe boy

Then you'd better set her free

Don't say things that are ugly
When she's beautiful inside
I don't think you deserve her
But she's loved you all this time

~~~*Chorus*~~~
She's a singing stream...
Runs pure and sweet...
She believes in ruby slippers
And she loves fairy tales
Rainbows aren't just colors
But a promise that won't fail..
She should not feel broken
Seem haunted and afraid..
How can you claim to love her
Love's not defined this way
~~*~~

~~*Finale*~~
It's so hard to see...
A pretty running stream..
Blocked off
Not free~flowing
No outlet for it's dreams...
You're the dam
Where's your shame
Love's not defined this way
~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright©2016

Wrdspnr@aol.com

PAINT A PICTURE

I want to paint a picture for you 

To store within your heart 

Something that sings, lightens your dreams 

When your world's falling apart 

I want to make your smile come home 

Bond with your trembling lips 

The ones you love, you're thinking of

Right here at your fingertips

This is what I really want to do...

Paint a picture for you

~~~*Chorus*~~~

Close your eyes, go ahead and cry

Don't fight the pain of loss

Say what you mean, go on and scream

We all know what it's cost...

Now...

Let yourself see a moment 

Laughing with the one you love

Breathe it in...

Soak it up...

There's your picture

~~*~~

I want to paint a picture for you 

To overshadow grief

Highlight the times, when their life shined

Planting magic true and deep

I want to frame what you remember

The magic is still there

It helps you keep, sweet memories

For when your heart needs repair

~~~*Lyrical Bridge*~~~

Can you see the picture

Their hand holding yours

Can you hear the memories

The laughter you have stored

Now, come on, smile for me....

And set that laughter free...

~~~*Chorus*~~~

Close your eyes, go ahead and cry

Don't fight the pain of loss

Say what you mean, go on and scream

We all know what it's cost...

Now...

Let yourself see a moment 

Laughing with the one you love

Breathe it in...

Soak it up...

There's your picture

~~*~~

Teresa Lynn Johnson

Copyright © 2016

Wrdspnr@aol.com